Should I stay or should I go?
These days, I've been thinking more and more of stopping to depend financially on my parents. Given the fact that the relations between my parents are getting even more complicated and insane than before (summary: my father is an asshole with my mother) and given the fact that my father does not give a shit about what I'm doing in Canada, saying to him "fuck you, I'm not going to keep on having a relationship with you just for your fucking money".
I know this post could seem like a shitty complaint of a young wannabe-rebel teenager but I just need for my psychological health to get rid of any relation with my father for a certain period of time. Given the fact that I'm a burden for him (as he has made me understand it), it won't be a problem for him.
It'll be hard at the beginning but, as regards the French systems of sholarships, I could be able to survive without his help. A job will be required but that's not a pb. I just have to wait until I'm back in France...
While I was thinking about this, I just realized that Family is a burden that society does not help you to get rid of. As soon as you want to study, you rely on your parents in an important part (if not the entire part): financial help for the State are determined in function of your parent's wealth even if they're not giving you money anymore (!) and it's a fucking long process for being recognized at independent from your Family and then have some financial support from the State. I've always hated family values because they're so conventional and imposed upon oneself since one's childhood that they're nothing but tyranny. The point is maybe that family is the place where each of us could be (except for some) his/herself and it is therefore the place where the lowest human behaviours could be expressed.
2 Comments:
putain t'es tendu,
person mon pere s'en bat la race de moi plus ou moins
enfin il maime bien mais il a aucune idee de comment faire vu kil a jamais ete pere
et je me dis attend PREND LARGENT rien a foutre (de ttes facons il men donne jamais dc c regle)( pke merde il te doit au moins ca
ton pere te force a rien en echange de largent kil te donne
dc prend le et profite
Sentir que tu es un boulet et qu'on souhaiterait que tu termines tes études au plus vite, ça devient vite insupportable. Je ne tolère plus l'idée de savoir que je dépend de lui. Déjà qu'il n'arrête pas de me bassiner avec "t'as déjà de la chance que je te paye tes études, c'est loin d'être un dû, blabla". C'est de l'hypocrisie de ma part de ne pas lui dire merde! Et puis rendre des comptes sur la moindre de mes dépenses, à 20 ans, je dis STOOOOOOOOP!
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